“You are so mean! Oh, you are so cold-hearted… As a girl, you should be nicer and more compliant! How are you going to find a husband with an attitude like that? Do you really have to be such a bitch?”
Probably most confident young women had heard all those opinions before. At least I listen to them every day of my life. People somehow assume that if you are fearless, bold and thick-skinned then probably you are a bitch. After all, as a woman, I should be a little bit more emotional and fragile… Well, guess what, it is the 21st Century, and I am not going to apologise for being the way that I am, as Madonna once said: “I am tough, I am ambitious and I know what I want. If that makes me a bitch, OKAY!”
What I must tell you is that I was not always a bitch. As a kid, I was usually a shy and obedient, never used inappropriate language, just tried to be the best version of myself; a good kid overall. Yes, I had my naughty moments like coming home later that supposed to or losing my home keys once in a while, but apart from that, I was a golden kid. And all because my parents used to tell me that if I am kind to people, I am going to be happy and everyone is going to love me. But as the years passed by, I realised that by being everyone’s friend, polite and quiet, I am not going to win anything in life. I watched my mum being quite and not confident in herself, being the devoted wife, and I saw how people were walking all over her, using and disrespecting her. Even her own family members. On the other side of the family, I watched my grandmother, a cold, thick-skinned woman, going through life without a doubt and unnecessary apologies. And guess what? I watched her and learnt how to be confident, bold and ambitious aka a modern bitch. My friends call me bitch, my coworkers call me a bitch, even my mum continually reminds me that I am a bitch, but guess what? I am alright with it because at least I get shit done. I am not offended by peoples opinions about my toughness, and I could not care less if someone feels intimidated by me, it is on them, not on me after all. And if you have that little bitch voice inside you screaming to be heard, go ahead girl, let it roam free! Let me explain to you how it is going to help you succeed in life.
From an early age, we have been told that swearing is a bad thing for many reasons. It is considered to be rude, not lady-like and a sign of very low IQ. Horrible, right? Well, let me tell you that all those assumptions are a big pile of shit! Recent studies show that swearing is quite the opposite of evil, it actually helps you cope with physical and emotional pain! Yes, that is true, a study presented to British Psychology Society by Dr Richard in 2014, showed that swearing is related to our emotional state and by swearing when in pain, emotional or physical, we are able to deal with it better. It also helps to cope with stressful situations and who is not stressed nowadays? So whenever you feel like swearing, don’t be shy; bad bitches swear with confidence!
Another benefit I have discovered by being a bitch is having only real people around me. Real people attract real people, it’s a natural law. Fake people will not be tempted to be your friend because they just do not have the strength to be around you. And I believe that everyone is better off when surrounded by genuine people because it means less drama and more quality time. When you eliminate all horrible people from your life, it also helps your health, and you will have one thing less to stress about in your life. I have my closest friends group, and we all are genuine and real even though it means that sometimes we need to tell each other nasty things that we do not want to hear. But it is all for the better! We keep it very simple, no bullshit, no lies and only honest opinions because in that way we can really trust each other. Before I tried having a lot of friends because I am an extrovert and I need constant communication but when I was being helpful to too many people they started taking advantage of me, of course, I got exhausted after some time, and it just did not reflect well in my well being. You can’t please everyone so why even try?
After all, the thing that I love most about being a bitch is personal freedom. Hell yes, it feels good not to give AF what people think about you, what they say about you or what they see when they look at you. It definitely frees you when you start concentrating on more important things, yourself and your goals. Opinions of those who don’t matter are not going to impact how good you will be at your job or in your relationship. If you feel like you have a fantastic idea for a project at work, but you are afraid what others will think, fuck it, go ahead and make your idea matter. You will see how confidence and boldness will intimidate those who do not have strong personalities like you! You are fabulous and fierce, and you do your thing in your own way! This mindset will get you far in life, keep going.
Of course, like everything in life, being a bitch has two sides. I am not talking advantages/disadvantages here, I talk about reasons for being a bitch. As I have mentioned before, being a bitch gets you a lot in life, but only if you are one for your own wellbeing. What I mean by that is, if you will think that it is cool to be a bitch by going around and gossiping about others, hurting someone’s feelings for your own pleasure or just being mean for fun, stop! It is not the right reasons why I encourage freeing your inner bitch, oh no, that kind of behaviour is going to bring you more troubles than right, and it is not the behaviour of a strong and confident woman. Bitches support other bitches, and they do not aim to harm others. Leave that kind of attitude for weak-ass girls that don’t have any respect for themselves.
I do believe that it is a perfect time to connect with your inner bitch and start embracing all benefits of being one! Nothing feels better than freedom does. Be bold, be fierce, be THE BITCH!